You’ve been lied to about menopause.

About what menopause really is. What it means for you. And the right (and wrong) things to do.

That’s what today’s all about.

Now you might be wondering what I could know about menopause. A very fair question.

To be honest, I know nothing at all from personal experience.

Unless there’s such thing as man-opause? I can see you nodding your head after thinking about your husband lol.

In all seriousness, I’ve been able to learn a lot about menopause in practice through working with women over 40 for the past 9 years.

And in theory after studying biology, physiology, and now taking a brand new course with Dr Stacy Sims, an exercise physiologist, who has dedicated her life to understanding how women can take control of their menopause.

I thought I knew a lot until I took this course.

What I share with you today might be new information to you. Probably information that challenges what you’ve been told before.

If that’s the case, I ask you to have an open mind…

And know that it’s a good thing because most of what you’ve been told before is wrong.

Starting with what menopause really is.

With menopause, there’s so much conflicting information. There’s confusion. And there’s an outright lack of knowledge from people you want to lean on for help (doctors, OBGYN’s, etc).

The first misconception is what menopause really is.

What most people (myself included) call menopause is actually three different stages.

Counterintuitively, peri-menopause is the first stage.

Peri-menopause often starts in women around 35-40 years old and can last 4-10 years depending on the person.

When you think of irregular cycles, hormones fluctuating, mood swings, poor sleep, hot flashes, and unwanted weight gain…this is peri-menopause

That’s what makes peri-menopause so challenging is there’s no one-size-fits-all recommendation because all women are different.

I’ve talked to women who equate this time period to literal hell. Tossing and turning in their bed, cooking from the inside out one minute to freezing and taking all the covers from their husband the next.

And then I’ve talked to women who have barely experienced any side effects at all.

After peri-menopause, you move into menopause…but only for one day. Yep, you read that right.

By definition, menopause is one single day or a moment in time.

This moment in time is exactly 12 months from your last period. The average age for this moment marking 12 months since your last period (menopause) is 51 years old.

Where menopause marks the end of peri-menopause, it starts the next stage…

Post-menopause.

On a hormonal level, what makes post-menopause different is now estrogen and progesterone stay low and stable rather than fluctuating.

The benefits of these hormone changes are that it creates a new baseline. A baseline of stability and less of symptoms mentioned above.

However, this new baseline also comes with some less favorable characteristics.

More weight gain, mood swings, anxiety, depression, and bloating.

While having less muscle and sleep.

This can look and feel like a bleak time for obvious reasons.

But what makes it worse is what you’re often told from those you want to lean on.

We talked before about the technical definition and timeline of what menopause really is (with what peri and post are too)…

But for the sake of simplicity and using the most common language, I’m going to stick with calling this whole cycle menopause. I hope that’s ok and not confusing…

As the title above shares, there are many ways in which women go about menopause wrong. Maybe you’ve done these things too.

To be fair, it’s to no fault of your own.

When the people you rely on for the best health information…don’t have the right information, you’re at a disadvantage.

My mom managed an OBGYN’s office for many years and shared that these doctors, doctors who specialize in women’s care, didn’t know how to help women going through menopause.

Because of that, you’re given the wrong things to do.

Do any of these sound familiar?

HIIT training. Low-carb or 1200-calorie diets. Intermittent fasting. “Just do what worked in your 20s.”

These aren't just ineffective for women over 40…they can backfire leaving you worse off. (More on why next week)

While all of these “solutions” are not the right advice for women over 40, there’s an even worse idea that’s thrown around.

One that I will spend the rest of my life working to debunk.

And that is, “it’s just part of getting older.”

Or “Well… you’re in your 40s now. This is just what happens.”

Worst of all, “There’s nothing you can do. There’s no magic fix. You’ll just have to ride it out.”

I apologize in advance for what I’m about to say…mom, if you’re reading this, I’m sorry too…

All of that is bullshit.

Are things different than before? Yes.

Can they feel harder? Of course.

Does that mean you’re stuck with no hope forever? Absolutely not.

And honestly, that advice is worse than recommending intermittent fasting or 1200 calorie diets.

Because they’re taking away your agency. Telling you it’s out of your control.

And nothing will make you more anxious, depressed, and sad than having no options.

Fortunately, it’s not true.

There are things you can do that are within your control.

To give you a sense of optimism.

And that’s where I want to pick up next week.

With an actionable plan to help you:

Ultimately to help you take control of your menopause…and not let it control you.

In next week’s article, we will cover:

And a lot more!

As we wrap up Part 1, here's what I want you to know…

You're not broken.

Your body isn't failing you.

You've just been given the wrong map.

Next week, I'll give you the right one. A real plan built for how your body works now, not how it worked 20 years ago.

You deserve better than "just ride it out."

Let's fix that together.

Your friend and coach,

Ben Miknis

P.S. I’d love your help with next week’s article. Reply and tell me, what's the one symptom you'd most want to fix? I’ll make sure to answer it for you next week